Present flow chart — Your soon-to-be ex-friend

Is there somewhere else you'd like them to be? Maybe with suffient postage and addressed to Abu Dhabi...

Maybe send them packing with some good advice.

Have you never forgiven them for dragging you to their poetry readings?

Or on onithological trips?

For introducing you to that crazy girl last summer...

Or are they the crazy ones?

Are they leaving you soon for far foreign lands?

To seek out new life...

...and strange people...

...in order to feel at one with humanity?

Are they likely to get lost?

Are you just cheap and lazy and can't be bothered shopping?

Not right? Try, try again... Back to the beginning!