From the bestselling author of Confessions of a Bad Mother and Queen of Bad Motherhood, Stephanie Calman comes a new, inspiring, empowering, amusing, startling and occasionally touching anti-manual.

In Confessions of a Bad Mother, Stephanie described how she brought up her children 'wrong'. Now she unlocks her singular inability (but one which secretly we all share) to grow up: forty-five last birthday but she doesn't feel any older, but of course she does - as in deafer, stiffer, and less able to read the dosage instructions on a bottle of Calpol. But the supposedly normal challenges of human existence feel frequently as though they are beyond her. Life is constantly confusing, frustrating and, at times, overwhelming. At forty-five - but only on paper - she's still a child in a suit, bluffing her way with one eye looking over her shoulder, expecting any minute to be found out and taken back to the nursery. Of course, that isn't such a bad place to be. Sometimes she even wants to go back there, but is cruelly aware that she no longer fits the chairs.

Also featuring:
Things to Cook in Stilettos When You're Drunk
Why I am a Time Lord
A Hundred Ways to Wreck an Evening
Ten Things They Don't Tell You in Biology and
The Grown-Ups' phrase book.

Stephanie Calman's candid, touching and hysterically funny new book gives hope to bad mothers and failed grown-ups everywhere: read it and know that you are not alone.