They've stopped holding late-night sessions in Parliament. Or have they? Imagine a House of Commons with the cameras switched off, the press and public excluded, but with the bar still open. What sort of vile abuse might hon. Members hurl at each other if they were pissed and off the record? In these unofficial transcripts of Parliamentary Proceedings, Ian Martin ('The Thick Of It') documents the sweary debates of the Coalition Government's first year in power. Contains very strong language - and very weak personalities - desperate to make their mark in British politics by saying anything, however horrible.